We’re four guys who love music: writing it, playing it, performing it. This is us:
Chris: Vocals, guitar. Kicker of all things high up. Is the brother of Thor. Voted “Best Hair” by the other members in his band. Breeds geckos on the side. Really into sleeping. Lucky Charms enthusiast. Good at doing the laundry. Hates that he’s good at doing the laundry. Used to train lions for the circus, but found it too dull. Dreams of being a meteorologist when he grows up. Enjoys footraces with strangers. Fan of archaeology. Makes Indiana Jones look like a kid in a sandbox. Once lost his left shoe 42 times in one day.
Rob: Lead guitar, background vocals, muscle. Makes Survivor Man look like a sissy. His dream is to one day just walk out into the wilderness and keep on walking-with his guitar along for the ride, of course. Biggest fan of root beer floats. Makes the best fettuccine alfredo you’ll ever eat in your entire lifetime. Was once offered a position as Jason Bourne’s stunt driver, but turned it down due to “scheduling conflicts.” Loses things in his own house more often than his wife can count. Expert on all things mythical and make-believe. Has a smile that could charm even Grumpy Cat. Has more sisters than all of the brothers of the other band members combined.
Austin: Bass, guitar, background vocals.
Michael: Kick-a drums. Once killed a man just to watch him die. Moonlights as Chuck Norris’ stunt double every other weekend. Went all 10 rounds with a rabid wolverine and came out without a scratch. The wolverine was not so lucky. Currently saving up all of his pocket change to buy his own mountain. Likes to hunt and has bagged all of the major game on every continent using only a slingshot and his bare hands. Only has to look in a girl’s general direction to get her number. Built a full-scale model of Notre Dame, Rose Window and all, in his front yard in one day. On a whim one summer, he moved to Alaska to drive bus tours for a cruise line.