"Ham for the Holidays" The Turkey Song by CCG Pop Superhero & Lil Stinker BOSTON

"HAM For The HOLIDAYS

Frosty morning sunrise, leaves are gonna' fall
Holidays are coming ... This turkey's feeling small ..

VERS
My mother told the story of how Grandma was whacked.
She crept into the kitchen and saw her on a rack.
Feathers plucked, all full of stuff, she was lying in the buff.
Worst of all, no head was looking back

CHORU
Why can't everyone have ham for the holidays?
Why can't everyone have pork with their pies
I guess I'll never know. I guess I'll never grow.
Guess I should learn how to fly..

VERSE I
I wake up to the laughter from the old pig pen.
He knows it's me they're after. He's teasing me again
Isn't PORK "The *other* white meat?," I recall ...
Now the pig is silent in his stall!

I've heard that there's savior in religion.
In India, the cow's a sacred beast
But my faith is low ... feelin' fat ...
look silly in this pilgrim hat.
No Hindu's gonna' save me from this feast!

CHORU

BRIDG
Why can't life be like "A Christmas Story?"
I'd sing "Fa Ra Ra Ra Ra" and be in luck
Then, I'd only model for the pictures
and they would all be drooling at the duck

VERSE II
But life is never just like in the movies.
I've been gettting overfed for days
I'm plucking out my feathers in a frenzy ...
Why is it Jews don't eat pork anyway?

Last night the barn fell silent.
I've wondered what was wrong
Just like my Mom before me, I'll sneek into their home
Feathers shakin', chance is taken. Why do I think
I smell bacon? Oh my God, the pig is in the stove!

CHORU
Why can't everyone have ham for the holidays?
Why can't everyone have pork with their pies
Sure pigs are cleaner and they're smarter,
but juicier for roasting, turkey's dry
At least this much I know, I guess this year,
I'll grow. Next year, I'll learn how to fly..

Lynn Julian, ASCAP, Cookie Cutter Publishing